梦醒时分

梦醒时分

你说你爱了不该爱的人

你的心中满是伤痕

你说你犯了不该犯的错

心中满是悔恨

你说你尝尽了生活的苦

找不到可以相信的人

你说你感到万分沮丧

甚至开始怀疑人生

早知道伤心总是难免的

你又何苦一往情深

因为爱情总是难舍难分

何必在意那一点点温存

要知道伤心总是难免的

在每一个梦醒时分

有些事情你现在不必问

有些人你永远不必等

The Moment

In life, we seldom think much for LIFE...

Have you ever think what life for, what are the things that you should do, so that you never regret in your afterlife. How are we going to spend the next 50 years? For career? For family? Just now, at one of the moment, I do think. I want my life to be special, I don't want to waste my remaining years (may be months, or even days). After that moment, I felt desperate with my original plan of life. Hope that my only life could be special one for myself...

Difficult...
I find out all things coming right now, is difficult...
Making my mood right now, very bad...
That feeling is felt so so bad, hard to explain...
Don't know what to do, just wait to be all right...
With a damp hungry stomach...

Random....

Sometimes, is just forget that I'm still a human being...

I'm forcing myself too tight, I feel stress...

Every times, I just putting others before me as my priority...

I care for He and She, but I forget me already...

I love myself too, but in the other ways...

:) :) :)

X sleep

Again, I having trouble to get sleep...

Already 5 hours I lay down on this bed....

Argh....  I was soo tired at this moment....

Pls give me a proper sleep my lord.....

Pain...
不知为什么, 心,  还是会痛...
不同的是, 感觉不再强烈了...
这是一个, 我与'心'的秘密...

Need to be stronger...

千万不要把自己的软弱展现给别人看`

千万不要把自己的狼狈述说给别人听`

因为没有人多少人会觉的你很可怜而同情你，只会觉得你很无能很没用`

什么事情都要学会自己一个人承担，因为没有人多少人会帮你`

什么事情都要学会自己一个人坚强，因为凡事都靠自己...

birthday...
Again, this year has nobody wish me for birthday...
Mom, too busy for her up coming niece...
Dad, always forget...
Brother, busy for new work...

I purposely remove my birthday on facebook...
As my predict, nobody wishes me birthday on my status...
I m just want to finding my value in among family and friend...
Finally, the outcome making me so down....

Anyway, what I m want to say is,
I m still here waiting for your wish...
You are the only 1 I care...

As I m growing UP...
Feeling made human amazing and being special...
As we get older, all feeling changed...
What suppose to be happy, become normal instead of happy...
And the same goes to others feeling...
Is it humanity gonna disappears? I don't know...

Today, is the "big day", as I m a Chinese....
It's our Chinese New Year...
But now, I m writing my blog here...
I m going to say about my feeling, happy/sad/excited?
But can you imagine?

Anyway, I m still working hard finding the happy of me....

2012, my 1st post...
New year, new year, new year...
It seem like a change, but it doesn't seem going good...
I just feels that something more worst going to happen...
I think, maybe my dump brain short circuit...
I will still keeping my finger cross to god,
Hoping for a brand new life, ++good life...

Ready...
Although it's still pain, but it's not important now...
I m not deserve the things you do...
It's useless waiting for someone,..
who will never come back to you again...
May be, I deserve a better one, but not you...
I'm ready to have a new life...

From: Keanann

         天亮了, 很累了, 想休息了, 明天见
晚安早安...

                                                    To: Me

I'm Still Loving You...
When I close my eyes I think of you.
And the time we've had been through
Even through were far apart right now
I remembered back when you were here with me
How you've made my world complete
But now I'm left alone
We talked about love and hope
Wishing we could start a life our own
I wish that I could live without you.

Why did you tear my heart apart
You said you love me from the start
All those painful things you put me through
But I'm still loving you
I tried to give my best to you
I don't deserve the things you do
Everything has gone to memories
I just wish that I knew the truth behind the lies.

X'mas present for myself...

Suffering(6 months)...

I know, I should study...

I know, I should sleep...

I knows, I shouldn't starring laptop 24-7...

I knows, I shouldn't dota, dota and dota again...

Actually, while dota-ing, I didn't enjoyed at all...

Doing that, is to tell meslef that I m happy,

Doing this, is just finding some reasons for myself as well, 

For not to holding the books,

For failing my tests,

For being not perfect...
To feels better...

My New Baby of C Programming...
//Dream Cruise Holiday Company
//To calculate total cost for each customers
#include <stdio.h>
#include <conio.h>

int selection();
void showMenu();

int main(void)
{
  int command, cost=0, meal;

  showMenu();
  do{
      cost+=selection();
      printf("Any other order, Sir.\nYES>>1 NO>>0\n>>");
      scanf("%d",&command);
     }while(command==1);

  printf("Do you want to purchase meal vouchars, sir?\n");
  printf("Enter amounts of meal vouchers>> RM");
  scanf("%d",&meal);

  cost+=meal;
  printf("\nTotal of this transaction is RM%d.", cost);
  printf("\n\nThank You For Purchasing Our Service.");
  printf("\nHave a nice day...");

  getch();
  return 0;
}

void showMenu()
{
  printf("Dream Cruise Holiday Company\nPrice List>>\n\n");
  printf("Normal Price>>\nAdult:RM200 Child:RM140\nOrder Code: 1\n\n");
  printf("Family Package>>\n2 Adults and 2 children only.\nAt only RM600.\nOrder Code: 2\n\n");
  printf("Group Travel Package>>\n10 people whose travel together\nCost only RM1800 (save
             RM200).\nOrder Code: 3\n\n");
}

int selection()
{
  int nA, nC, nFP, nGP, order_code, cost;

  do{
      printf("Please enter your order code>>");
      scanf("%d",&order_code);

      switch(order_code)
      {
        case 1: printf("Enter the no. of adult>>");
                scanf("%d", &nA);
                printf("Enter the no. of child>>");
                scanf("%d",&nC);
                cost=(nA*200)+(nC*140);
                break;

        case 2: printf("Enter the no. of family package>>");
                scanf("%d",&nFP);
                cost=nFP*600;
                break;

        case 3: printf("Enter the no of group package>>");
                scanf("%d",&nGP);
                cost=nGP*1800;
                break;

        default: printf("You have entered an invalid code, please try again.\n");
      }
    }while(order_code>3);

  return cost;
}

I Hate Porridge...
我病了, 发烧...
身体很烫, 很烧, 头有点痛...
嘴巴很淡, 吃不下饭...
吃了2片activefast就睡去了...

我讨厌在生病时吃粥...
很讨厌...

어떻게 해야만 다시는 당신을 그리워 하지 않을까? .

Is person who you're eating with...
McD, I had you for so long time,
Finally, today I can have a McD french fries again...
And, I realized the taste wasn't same as before...
Not so delicious...

May be, the fries served not fresh..
I m a bit disappointed and starred at my friends...
"Is it okay?" I m asking...
"It's normal....", they are eating unstoppable...

Sometimes, it taste nice, is just because of a person....

Complex Life...
In real numbers, i, doesn't make sense...
i=surd(-1), something  impossible 4 REAL...

Same to our life, not every "why" have the answer...
So, you shouldn't asking "y" anymore...
Maybe, "y" just don't exists...
Or, the answer maybe "x"...
(Doesn't make sense)

Try and  learn to accept,
what life gave to you...

The End...
说得出的痛, 不是痛...
沉默, 是唯一的办法...

Is Life...
When I was 5 years old,
Mum told me that happiness was the key to life.
When I went to school,
They asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up,
I wrote down "happy".
They told me that I didn't understand the assignment ,
And I told them they didn't understand life...
**By John Lennon.

Sorry For Loving You...

我们已经多久不联系了、感觉这一辈子都不会再见到你了。

有些事、不说是个结、说了是个疤。

那些不能说的秘密、会不会成为我们永不见面的借口。

一直在想、

很多年以后、如果我和你、就这样再也不联系、

可突然有一天、就这么站在喧嚣的人群里、相互注视着对方、

第一句话需要多大的勇气才说的出。
请你原谅, 我的无言...
**shared from somewhere.

Lesson In Life...
A wise man sat in the audience and cracked a joke.
Everybody laughs like crazy.
After a moment, he cracked the same joke again.
This time, less people laughed.
He cracked the same joke again and again.
When there is no laughter at crowd,
He smiled and said,

You can't laugh at the same joke again and again,
but why do you keep crying over the same thing,
over and over again?

Leave Me Alone...

Today, I m going to leaving my feeling on this wall...

Here, this the only place I feel secure and safe...

Because, there is nobody except me... 

Here, a place that definitely belongs to me only...

"Status: Active"

Today, I login Facebook using my friend acct.. I never thought gonna see her status again (As her status already been unsubscribe on my acct.). I hate myself for losing control and the heart pain that never less, after seeing her wall post. I m telling myself, I shouldn't like that, I should be happy as she had found her 1.
But, I just can't.

也许, 我们不该再联系...

你的信息, 你的境况, 看了, 只有心痛...

我真的很自私, 对不起...

Holiday Ends...
Leaving home tonight...
With 1 backpack and 1 hand carry...
Although it's quiet full already,
But, it feel like short of something, I don't know......

Weight on shoulder is lifting on...
It's never good, and I just can't continue...
When this life going to last?

At last, shooting zombies time, I m happy...
I love Left 4 Dead 2...

南拳妈妈-不该结束

窗外的雨停了 天空还是灰的  

因为爱情也停止了 

回忆在播放着 在笑容里停格 

画面会永远留着 

给多的是付出 少给的不算输  

感情不需要胜负 

我给了你全部 你还是想结束  

我说你永远幸福 

快乐的开始不该悲伤的结束  

付出多才会了解什么是幸福 

快乐的开始 祝福的结束 

快乐的开始不该悲伤的结束  

走到了末路还是会留下祝福 

我会牢牢记住  

你给的 全部 的全部 

Confused...
Today, there is something lucky happen to me...
I had received scholarship worth 40k, is quiet a lot to me...

I m happy and curious...
I don't know why, they choosing me,
I m not the better, but the laziest...
I m also doing well during interview,
Dyed hair, not be able speak a fluent language...

I m really not deserve to take this...
May be, I should reject this offer?

Some Sort Of Effort...

Sometimes you gotta try your hardest not to care,

no matter how much you really do...

I had tried my ever best in doing this,
I thought did it well, and, I was wrong...

1 picture, 1 massage, even 1 alphabet...

Is making all my effort wasted...
Finally, I realized, it doesn't work...

Don't think, don't hear, don't see, doesn't means it's gone...

That feeling seem not gonna change, although time passed...

And, I m still here...

Last Time...
时间过了, 很久很久...
回忆, 依然很清晰...
就像昨天的事...
心, 还是一样的痛...
感觉, 一点都没变...
只是, 希望没有了...

2nd NOV 2011...
I think I m okay now...
Just living simple and have a good life...

Keep on telling myself,
I m not special, is okay to be lazy...
I m not smart, is okay to do wrong...
I m not perfect, is okay to fail...

Try to feel a freaked new life...
Try to feel others with heart...
Try to do something dislike...

Feel life, just accept what the God decide...
And, I m not happy with my life...

SKEE 1023...

Exam is just passed, 4 hour ago...

Stress has gone, or may be it never come...

I didn't manage to do well...

But, I can't feel anything about my failure...

May be, I m no longer care for my study...

Is it this, what they called mindset,

Because of I didn't care, then I won't feel sad...

I m sitting down there, 

Seeing all kind of faces, after the exam...

Some of them was happy, some looks sad,

And the others are discussing about the questions...

At the least, they still having that kind of passion....

Now, I m sitting in front of my computer...

Doing nothing, but don't want to shut it down...

I just don't want to let you go, my mouse...

Should I stop?

Today...
我以为, 生活开始转变了...
我以为, 孤单的日子已经过了...
我以为, 笑了开心了就会没事了...
我以为, 不再伤心就是忘记了...

其实, 我一直都在欺骗着自己...
尝试, 遗忘着, 一个, 无法忘记的回忆...
以为找对了, 但感觉不再一样了...
在这刻, 我又想你了...

但发现, 我无法找回以前的快乐...
也许, 这一切已经不一样了, 找不回了...
是时候, 改变了, 做回现在的自己...
寻找真正的快乐, 为以后的生活而努力...